Red Shift
by Symphony of Demons
Summary: Since I am a adventurous, slightly stupid, courageous - mostly stupid though - person, I took it upon myself to let out a war cry and slam open the door. Only to be met with a lady looking at me with a condescending face. "Uh, do you think you could, erm, direct me to God's office, or something? I think we have an appointment?"
1. Chapter 1

**RED SHIFT**

Chapter 1: Black Hole

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><p>*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.**.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*<p>

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><p>Hey.<p>

Okay yes, Diary-san, you can laugh your non-existent ass off because, I - Natasha Ross- _do not write in diaries._

I am simply above writing in a _ruffly, hot pink, diamond studded! for fuck's sake, _diary.

_I just don't._

Okay- but what happens when your family can't handle your immense fabulous-ness and decides to give you a diary?

_You rant your poor, miserable soul out, Diary-san._

So here is my rant:

I _fuckingly _hate you, Diary-san. You know when a girl hates her friends because they are complete bitches, or when a little kid hates the driver of an ice cream truck for leaving?

_My hate goes beyond this shit._

I hate you from the bottom of my heartless, cold, rock-impersonating soul, because if it wasn't for you, maybe, just _fucking maybe, _I would have survived last night and not have sorta-died.

_Just fucking maybe._

But still, you are my only source of insanity right now, so _puh-leeze_, Diary-san, have mercy on my shitty life and do not disappear with the rest of my stuff.

_Puh-leeze._

_I am begging you._

_Clap, clap, hugs and kisses, rainbows and glitter with unicorns and all that happy shit,_

Your somewhat, maybe undead owner,

Natasha Ross.

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><p>I looked around; setting the horridly pink thing down.<p>

_Black._

That's all I literally saw. I'm stuck in some kind of limbo, with no way out, so I'm sorta just, you know..._casually writing in a hot pink, ruffled diary while watching a warp hole approaching me rapidly._

You know, _casually._

The thing already swallowed my other things up, including my phone so calling wouldn't really help.

But still, _even if I did, my mom wouldn't exactly want a phone call from a ghost._

Yes, I am supposedly _dead._

_Supposedly._

I mean, I could just be dreaming, and I could wake up tomorrow and be like:

"_Oh, what a wonderful dream I had!", _but I did sort of feel my heart stop and I did sort of see my blood spill across the road.

_Sort of._

My brain is still surviving on the thought that - _yes, this is only a scarily realistic dream where we die at only fucking sixteen and yes, we will wake up tomorrow without any doubts - _so yeah, I'm having trouble accepting the thought that I'm dead.

But I guess being a ghost would be cool, - _I could haunt the hell out of family - _but still, the joy of eating food and watching Naruto Shippuden would still remain in my - _erm, somewhat existent? - _heart.

So, am I dead or not is the million dollar question right now.

_I did see a weird, pale-ish guy with -gayish- long hair in the car that rammed into us, but..._did the car ram into me?

_Or is this a fragment of my imagination?_

Okay, all of these deep thoughts are really fucking important but I am _casually _being sucked into the black hole, but you know, other than screaming my ass off- I'm very casual.

_I am an extremely casual person._

I'm Natasha Ross, a fuckcakeingly confused sixteen year old; and this is my story.

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•• the Author Corner_** (that's meh) ••**_

_Hellooooooooo!_

_So... I've started a new story. I know, I know. It'll be hard to juggle two different stories and school at the same time. But damn, this idea has been going around in my head for a while._

_Kay, other than that, all I hafta say is:_

_Thank you immensely to my beta and awesome sister; Shadowmage97. Please check out her stories!_

_And to all of you reviewers (to my other story):_

_I lurve you all! It's your kind reviews and words that keep me going and if it wasn't for your kind souls I would have went back into my role of being a lazy bum._

_So thank chu-! And here are some (imaginary) cookies for you!_

_I'll try to update more but considering all this chaos I'm dealing with right now...but for you I'll do it!_

_other than that...i have a quick fact for you._

**_Smile, you don't own every problem in the world._**

_Bye and remember to review!_

**ScribblesFromDawn**


	2. Chapter 2

**RED SHIFT**

Chapter 2: Karin? Karin who?

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><p>Hullo.<p>

I'm back.

I don't know how fucking exactly I'm still alive, or what the hell I'm doing in a room, but, I got my diary and -_somehow – _have pajamas on, so I'm game.

Sort of.

I mean that light blue door is kind of -_actually really - _intimidating, seeing that yes, God and his army of angels or Satan and his trident could easily walk in and claim my soul.

Just saying.

But, since I am a adventurous, slightly stupid, courageous - _mostly stupid though - _person, I took it upon myself to let out a war cry and slam open the door.

_**Casually of course.**_

Only to be met with a red-haired lady looking at me with a condescending face.

_Erm, bitch much?_

I mean, since she was normal looking and she _did _seem like the type to be a secretary_, _I asked her the most appropriate question I could think of in this kind of situation.

"Uh, do you think you could, erm, direct me to God's office, or something? I think we have an appointment?"

The lady blinked.

"Karin, what in the world are you talking about? Get ready, your lesson starts in thirty minutes!"

I blinked.

What.

_The._

_**Fuck.**_

_Did she just fwaking say Karin?_

"Well? Change and go!"

I ran /screamed/crawled/scrambled to the room, looked in the mirror _conviently placed on the door only to see a red-haired , scarlet eyed girl._

Okay, pause.

I am _abso-fucking-lutely not a red-head, scarlet-eyed girl._

I am a fucking African-American, you bitches!

As in, curly dark hair, dark eyes and dark skin!

_So who the fuck saw it would be funny to reincarnate me - a potty-mouthed, sixteen year old with no sense of fashion - as Uzumaki Karin?_

Apparently Fate.

_**Well, damn you too fate.**_

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><p>Uzumaki Mei was an elegant, if a bit temperamental, lady.<p>

She liked things neat, proper, in place, and above all things - Mei _adored, _no_**, loved, **_cute things.

So when Mei gave birth to a such a cute baby girl, she was overjoyed. She took it upon herself to spoil the baby with adorable little yukatas and nice dolls here and there.

Mei adored Karin.

Karin was a spitting image of her mother. They were the same; from the famed Uzumaki red hair to the clans infamous temper.

The same fashion, the same punctuality, the same distaste in _unappealing...things _and above all, they shared the same obssesive behaviour.

Karin was Mei's life.

After the destruction of Whirlpool village in her grandfather's time, Mei and her family had scattered to the winds.

An Uzumaki was a valued commodity in ninja villages. With their strong, lively chakra, their healing talents, their sealing skills and the fact that the they were the best hosts for jinchuuriki, they were sought after and hunted.

Mei had found this small, quaint village and met her lovely Kenshi but she'd never forget her roots. It was her _duty _to teach Karin everything she was taught about being an Uzumaki kunoichi.

Karin was the center of her life.

So when her eight year old daughter was two hours late, messy looking, was asking about some office, and literally scrambling like an animal_,_ Mei was not amused.

Literally.

But, considering that yes, today was the day Grandfather was arriving and that he only came once a year to avoid suspicion, she let it pass.

This was until she heard the screams coming from her room.

"Karin! What is the meaning of this?"

"Erm, I was, uh, looking for my clothes and then I, uh, hit my toe?"

Mei narrowed her eyes at her seemingly dazed daughter. _This was not the Karin she knew._

"Your clothes are in the closet, Karin. I'm leaving to check on your father, so I'm trusting you to find your way to the backyard on time."

With that, Mei left, the disconcerted expression on her daughter's face burned into her brain.

She chuckled.

If she didn't know better, she would've thought a different person had taken Karin's place.

_What a joke._

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><p>I glanced out the door.<p>

_I am a sixteen year old with no motor-skills or athletic abilities, and now I'm a eight year old that's expected to start killing people._

_**How fucking nice.**_

I could try it safe and go along with it, but there was a _huge _chance I'd shit up the plot.

And didn't Karin work with Orochimaru? How the fuck did that even happen? _When_ did it happen?

There was no fucking way I was letting that male (and much creepier) Miley Cyrus anywhere near me.

My third and final option was to kill myself and hope I'd make it to Heaven - _which was seriously unprobable._

But... I _had_ always wanted to be a ninja...and Karin was _sort of really underrated so..._

_**Hella yes.**_

_**I was going to fuck shit up, be amazing, best of all...**_

_I could make my OTP canon._

Oh, the things I would do.

I giggled darkly. This world had another thing coming.

_But, there was a sight minuscule chance that this is actually a town of obsessive cosplayers._

Meh.

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•• Author's Corner_** (that's meh) ••**_

_Yeah, another chappie. Leave a review or I will eat you._

（＾∇＾）

_But still, press the review button and leave some words!_

_I gave Karin mom a name (Mei) because fer realz, I have no idea what her name is. _

_Review!_

_Bai,_

**ScribblesFromDawn**


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